Counselor's Corner

  A Japanese leader tasked a village craftsman to mend a piece of broken Chinese pottery. The craftsman added gold paint to the adhesive. The cracks and breaks, when mended with gold paint, became a part of the art. They called this approach “kintsugi,” which translated to “golden joining.” They found that when the cracks were incorporated into the art, the piece became even more attractive.    Pottery, once broken, can never return to its original state and it will never be the same piece again. It is hard to accept that simple truth. Instead we reach for our superglue and painstakingly dot it on two pieces, hold them together firmly for the recommended time, and celebrate when “you can barely tell!”    But if you look closely, you can always tell. Superglue, despite its magical properties, cannot fully eliminate the cracks. If you look closely enough, you are forced to see the truth that your hope and eyes missed at a zoomed-out perspective: “You can barely tell” is not the same as “

It is only when we have the courage to face things exactly as they are without any self-deception or illusion that a light will develop out of events, by which the path to success may be recognized.  I Ching *** Like most families with school-aged children, our morning routine is regimented. The boys typically arrive downstairs about 15 minutes after I call them. They make their lunches and eat breakfast while I get ready upstairs. We typically arrive at school a minute or so before (or after) carpool drop-off begins at 7:30. This morning was trickier. With temperatures slightly above freezing, finding gloves and coats needed to be added to the agenda. I handed that task over to them and found myself walking upstairs, anticipating a “Mom, I can’t find ____!” response.   Where did I last see the heavy coats? Do the heavy coats still fit? I know I bought several pairs of knit gloves a couple months ago…where are they now? Are they in the pile of laundry that has now overtaken the dirty c

I grabbed the red, dry erase marker and drew a large, circle-shaped scribble to represent a wire. Then I drew a blue scribble on top of it. I repeated the process with the black and green markers. I stepped away from the board and asked my fourth-grade, SUPERHEROIC Skills students, “What words would you use to describe those wires?” They identified several words like “confused,” “messy,” “messed up,” “ugly.” I wrote their words on the board as they called them out. I moved to a different section of the board.    I drew a red, coiled circle and repeated the pattern with the other three markers. I asked what words they would use to describe these wires (“Organized,” “Easy to see,” “Peaceful,” “Not messy”) and wrote those on the board.    We looked at the board together, comparing the two sets of wires. I asked one student which pile she would want if she needed to find the cord that would charge her iPad. She pointed immediately to the coiled wire section of the board. I asked why and sh