It’s the last day of school before winter break and the fifth graders were ready to celebrate at their all-grade party. They are going to start by watching their favorite holiday movie, 50 Timothys Running Ethiopia. And who wants to watch a movie without snacks? They are going to eat the best snacks ever: Violet mangoes and stinkbug zucchini. Then it will be time to deliver the presents they made for their teachers. First, they will visit Ms. Bowman’s room. They got her ultraviolet monsters. She will feel so sad and she will think “You are so good at this!” Next, they will go to see Ms. Franco. They got Ms. Franco 654,942 clocks. She will be so angry! She will think “I need help!” Next, they will go to Mr. Rodriguez’s room. He is getting a throw-up green, off-leash dog. The fifth graders know he will feel embarrassed and think “I’m thinking…” After visiting Mr. Rodriguez, they will head to Ms. Bonsall’s art room to deliver her present. They got her a sparkly black frog. She will be so annoyed and think “I’m thinking right now.” Oh, no! They forgot to deliver presents to Ms. Gordon and Mr. Hobson in the music room! They walk down the boardwalk. They give the music teachers the fuzzy movie seat they bought them. Mr. Hobson says, “I am so sick!” and Ms. Gordon says, “I like school!” They go upstairs to Ms. Barrow’s drama room. They bought her 6 million beds. She says “I feel so destructive!” and shows her feelings by fidgeting. They go down to the field where Coach Solomon is playing basketball. The fourth graders give the him the 27 dogs they bought them. They wish them Happy Holidays and Coach Solomon says he feels stressed and thinks “How was your morning?” They stop by the kitchen to wish Chef Barnwell a good winter break and give him his present, white cucumbers. He that he feels very sad to know such wonderful students. He thinks “What are we doing right now?” And, finally, they stop by Mrs. Steinbach’s desk to wish her Happy Holidays. She is feeling butterflies in her stomach to see them! She tells them how proud of them she is and that she thinks “What am I going to do today?” They return to their advisories, back up their BOSes, grab their jackets and water bottles, and head to dismissal. It was the most juicy holiday party Rawson Saunders School has ever had.
“What are we supposed to say to the kids?” A teacher asked me Wednesday morning when we arrived on campus. I knew immediately what she meant. News of the school shooting in Uvalde hit too closely to home for us as Central Texans, parents and educators. What are we supposed to say to the kids following something that is difficult for adults to understand? My journey to answering that very challenging question began almost 22 years ago. I began my career with a postdoctoral fellowship in child abuse and trauma in August 2000. Unbeknownst to us at the time, my fellow postdoc and I were 12 months away from being called upon to support children, parents, and teachers through the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001. Far too often in the intervening years, I have needed to dust off my child trauma psychologist toolbelt to help parents and teachers find ways to soothe their children’s fears while they themselves are grappling with big, heavy emotions. Here is what I know for sure:
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